Even
though many people like Facebook, I am not a fan of this social media platform.
It is very time consuming and the scrolling is never ending. Нow that I am semi-retired, I am
still always short of time. Recently, after several very active days, I finally
got the day off and decided to login to Facebook. I was really curious to see
what my compatriots were crying about on the "Bukharskie Toje
Plachut" page. I wasted almost five hours on this page instead of the
allotted one, and I did not see Bukharian Jews actually crying (except for
memorials). In fact the opposite, there were a lot of funny or serious posts,
moral teachings, pictures, congratulations, etc. And thank goodness! Why cry,
and to the whole world?! But strangely enough, I saw plenty of politics and a
lot of romance etc.
I
started getting nervous about wasting time on this nonsense when suddenly I
came across a post: a photograph of a very beautiful young woman
with a cell phone in her hand, and on the screen, there was a name of a man
labeled - MUZH ZASRANETS (JERK HUSBAND)! The author of this "unique"
post asks the readers: "How do you label your husband on your phone?” I
immediately realized that this was a sign to me from above, not a waste of
time, instead - an opportunity to address the topic of us “girls” in the
magazine. Seeing the reality around me, this was the right moment for me to
address this issue since I haven’t discussed it in the magazine for quite some
time. For me personally, it does not matter how this picture was taken: as a
joke or taken from real life, it does not matter who put it on Facebook for
public display, what purpose the author had and so on. It is irrelevant. The
important thing is that by calling her husband names, the woman is not only
humiliating him (no matter how bad he was), but is also reflecting her
intellect and upbringing to the world, not to mention a bad example to others.
Any self-respecting woman would not stoop to insults and such revelations on
social networks, humiliating herself first and foremost. You have probably
heard women frequently complaining that true gentlemen are non existent
nowadays. But, as one of my friends remarked very aptly, though sarcastically,
"true ladies no longer exist either!" It was difficult to argue with
him, because the girl from Facebook – is a clear confirmation of his reaction.
We all
want to please our men and for this we put a great deal of effort: spend a lot
of time and money to look beautiful, elegant, and well-groomed. And this is
very important because a man first "loves with his eyes" our outer
shell. But only at first! There is another, not less, or maybe more important -
what a woman is as a person! And among the entire range of personal qualities,
such as character, intelligence, intellect, etc. a special place should be
given to family upbringing and self-teaching throughout life. I deliberately do
not mention education, which although makes us better, but for the most part is
aimed at simply giving us a profession. That is why it is not uncommon for people
of the same profession, even highly educated ones, to behave differently in the
same situation. It is the well-behaved woman with good manners who is perceived
as a lady. Such a woman is respected by a man! And his respect is worth a lot.
Next to such a woman, a man becomes a gentleman. This process is mutual. Not
taking for granted, the age-old wisdom that says: "The price for a man is
his wife", or: "A man is raised by two women - first the mother, then
his wife. And what kind of wife the woman is, largely depends on whether the
husband becomes a “knight”.
At any time throughout our lives, we women can
change ourselves so that everyone treats us, especially our husbands, with
dignity. It is not easy, but it is possible. A lot depends on us in the
family. Our upbringing begins with our mothers but then our husbands gets
involved, for whom we change in order to have peace and prosperity in the home.
Try to replace negative words with positive ones towards your spouse, and you
will not wait long for amazing results! And remember: the most important
factors in relationships are love and respect. Over the
years, respect becomes more important.
Editor-in-chief Doctor Zoya Maksumova
(June 2019, "Ladies’ World №216)