Dear Rachel,
My kids are addicted to
screen time. They either watch shows or play games and my older kids don’t even
want to meet with friends! Also, their school requires that students have their
own laptop. When I have to get things done around the house, unless I give them
what they want, they don’t let me alone!
Sincerely, Fed Up Mom
Dear Fed Up Mom,
This is a common problem
parents are experiencing with their kids. It may be easy to give up this fight
and just assume there’s not much that can be done for this generation of
children. But I am here to tell you to be strong and to NOT look the other way!
The addiction to screen time is a real problem on many levels for children. Not
only does their creativity (outside of screen time) suffer, but so does their
motivation to live life to their fullest. They also suffer in interpersonal
relationships as they start to prefer screen time to actually seeing friends
face to face and developing the kind of communication skills that are paramount
in a healthy relationship. Another important point to make is that the number
one way a person develops self worth is through giving of themselves to others.
However when the majority of free time is spent absorbing screen time, there is
no time for the child to help bake cookies for the next door neighbor whose
daughter just broke her arm, make a meal for a mother who just gave birth, or
visit a lonely senior who doesn’t have family close by. Those are 3 examples,
but there are many ways to help children become people focused and develop
their self worth. But, before creating any plan, look at how you use your own
time (especially screen time) to see if you are sending the wrong message to
your children. Here are some ideas to think about and incorporate in your
family: 1. Reconsider sending your children to a school that requires kids to
have their own laptop. 2. Have regular times as a family when devices are not
allowed: meal times, holiday celebrations, quality time/outings together, etc.
3. Have regular SET times when the children do homework on the computer – make sure it’s in an area you can view the
child. 4. Have fun ways kids can utilize their time: a comfy reading area for
your kids with wholesome books, a cabinet with lots of art and craft supplies,
cook books with basic baking/cooking supplies, a shelf with various board
games, outside activities like jump rope, chalk, balls, or ping pong, etc., as
well as puzzles and brain challenge activities, etc. Back in the day, kids
didn’t need a lot to be entertained but nowadays, with screen time being such a
temptation, we must be ready with more to offer them. 5. Continually look for
opportunities to be helpful to people in the community WITH your children. 6.
Have parental controls on all devices and NO phones with internet for older
children. Be consistent and firm but do all this with love, not with anger or
irritation because as a parent you want to communicate your care for them, and
not your desire for control. Things may get worse before they get better but
don’t give up, you’ll get there! B’hatzlacha!
All the very best, Rachel
Trilokekar
Thank you to those who have
e-mailed me with their questions. If you would like your question to be
featured in the next issue of Ladies’ World, please e-mail:
RachelTrilokekar@gmail.com
