Daniel chai Sofiev, a
smart young man, who recently celebrated his bar mitzvah in Jerusalem at the
Kotel, and then in New York. He was trained at Beth Gavriel Jewish Center, by
Roman Plishtiev, who described Daniel as one of his best pupils. Daniel is a
good student, who likes sports. He enjoys playing basketball and backgammon as
well as writing essays.
I am always fascinated by the miracle of
Hanukkah, when as tradition tells us, one day of oil for relighting the eternal
flame in the Temple lasted all eight days. That’s why I often remember one cold
and snowy winter night. It was a special night for me. It was the eve of
Hanukkah. I was a small child. My parents took me and my sisters to our great
grandmother's-Yafa’s warm and cosy apartment. We were glad to see some of our
cousins inside playing dreidel games. A happy commotion broke out just as
soon as babulya Yafa gave each of us a hug, treated us to golden Hanukkah gelt
and chocolate coins. Later, we sat around her festive table, munching on
delicious potato latkes that she served us from a hot and oily pan. Then
babulya Yafa said: “ Let’s begin our Festival of Lights,” as she said the
bracha and lit the flame of the shamash on her small menorah with colorful
candles.That night, at my great grandmother Yafa’s home was a special night for
all of us. She taught us all the bright lessons of unity and sharing.
Just like the unity of the small group of Maccabees, enabled them to defeat the
Greek army. And just like the Maccabees stood by each other, babulya Yafa stood
up for all of us. There won’t be more Hanukkah celebrations with her- for she
is now gone.
On Thursday, November 27, 2022, the entire
Sofiev family, joined by members of our community, gathered together to
commemorate the thirty-day Yushuvo of the passing of my great-grandmother, Yafa
Sofieva. She was a proud woman, who liked to help people. She enjoyed doing
mitzvot and doing good deeds. My great-grandma was a strong woman. She lived in
Russia during hard times when Jews weren’t much liked. She was the oldest child
in her family, and helped to take care of her brother and sisters, during a
time of war, she was the one responsible for their well being. I didn’t really
know her quite as well as my father and grandfather did, but I heard many
stories about her and one story stuck with me. During her childhood in Tashkent
bread was scarce, because of horrors or World War Two. She was on a bread line
and when it was her turn, she was given the last loaf of bread available.
A young girl behind her began to cry, because she desperately needed bread for
her family. My great-grandma was kind enough to give the girl that last
loaf of bread, even though she had to feed her own family. My great-grandmother
left this world at the age of 89, leaving a proud legacy, and she had many grandchildren,
and great-grandchildren who adored and revered her. She always gave us the
warmth of her soul and part of her loving heart, generating love and respect
for her, from her grateful children and grandchildren. A famous writer once
said, “Disrespect for ancestors is the first sign of immorality.” We should
always remember our ancestors and the impact they had on us.
Some say, she had an easy death, and like
white snow falling from the sky, an angel of Hashem came to take her to heaven.
She passed away in her sleep. This death has been hard for our family since she
played a big role in our family and in our hearts, but I feel It was a relief
for my great-grandmother, because lately she was suffering every day of
the illnesses of old age. Our family would always look after her. We cared
for her and didn’t want her to leave this earth, because it would mean losing a
piece of our hearts. My grandpa Rafael, his brother, uncle Yury and his
sister aunt Marina cared for her most of the time. I remember how they would go
to her house to check up on her to make sure nothing bad had happened and they
would even sleep there. I remember I was sitting in my grandpa's house one
night, when he had to go to babulya Yafa’s place . I went with him and when we
arrived at her house, she saw how concerned I was about her and my
grandpa, so she offered me a gift. She gave me a special plate that she had
brought along from Uzbekistan, forty years ago. That special hand carved wooden
plate once belonged to her father. I saw how precious that plate was to her,
and I realized that she had so many memories stored in that plate. I
thanked her, but I couldn't accept such a treasure, and told her to keep it.
She was a very good woman and she will be in our thoughts forever. But God does everything for a reason. Her loss will be felt in the Bukharian Jewish community, since she had done so many good deeds and we all felt her to be a very special person. She raised all her children correctly and her teachings will be passed down to me and all other great grandchildren of hers. We will learn how to be kind, like her. Every year, during Hanukkah we will gather to remember our babulya Yafa and those colorful Hanukkah candles lighted by her. My great-grandmother left us a rich legacy and that's why her memory will continue to live on in our hearts.
***
“ Do not stand at my grave and
weep
I am not there. I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn rain”
Daniel Sofiev, 13 year old, great grandson
